THIS RAP WILL MAKE YOU SMARTER subtitles

- And this side here, if you're in this sectionof this little section here,what do you want to hear a rap about?- [Audience Member] Days of the week.- The days of the week?(audience laughs)What a great fuckin' suggestion!Mate, that's just so, it's right under our noses!I like that, cool.Everyone else fuckin' hated it,but they're wrong.They are.You know, he probably,it's Friday night,You're probably like,'Oh, why can't I say big hairy balls or something?"Days of the week.Right so, you guys here, what do you want to rap about?- [Audience Member] Fallopian tubes.- There were two, pigments of color and fallopian tubes.We will take the variation of colors,in fallopian tubes.(audience laughs)- I'm sure they're all different colors, aren't they?Cool, so.(audience laughs)Probably.And don't make out like you've seen them!None of you have seen fallopian tubes.My dick's so big, I fucking see them all the--No!Okay, so days of the week,the variation of color in fallopian tubes,stop explaining what fallopian tubes are.(audience laughs)What, guys in the middle, what do you want to rap about?- [Audience member] Bad facial hair!- Bad facial hair, cool.Just wanna check, that's not pointed at me is it?I am--(audience laughs)Oh good.Uh, bad facial hair,what would you say is the worst facial hair?- [Audience Member] A mustache.- A mustache?Okay, cool.I mean you had the goatee to go for,you chose mustache, no!Mustache, fine, mustache.Days of the week.The variations of color in fallopian tubes.Guys over here, so far these are some great suggestions.So let's keep it up.- [Audience Member] Axolotls.- Axolotls, ah!(audience cheers)- Jesus fucking Christ, what's wrong with you?Hi, we're the Australian Axolotl Association,Triple A, yeah, having a great time, yeah?They are an animal, but,because it's quite specific and niche,I feel like that's a fair suggestion.The animals rules just stop people sayingdogs and stuff like that.If you don't know what axolotls are,they a type of kind of permanently juvenile salamanderthat lives in a network of caves,only in Central America, specifically, I think Mexico.And yeah, fuck you, I know loads about them so,(audience laughs)I love it when people try and catch you out,and then you're like uh, when I was thirteen,I really wanted an axolotl,because I didn't have any friends.(audience laughs)- Guys over here.- [Audience Member] Brexit!- What?- [Audience Member] Brexit!- Brexit's too obvious a suggestion, I'm afraid.I know it is literally happening right now,like this is the final day.We're gonna finish the showby holding hands and singing Auld Lang Syneit's going to be great.- [Audience member] Astronauts!- Lord Lucan and astronaut.Okay, Lord Lucan astronaut, yeah.Oh, you guys know who Lord Lucan is, right?(audience shouts)Well you'll find out in the rap, won't you?(audience laughs)Okay, cool.So, I love the fact that like 20 of you knew axolotls,but you're like, oh a kind of British Lordwho murdered his wife, no, we've never heard of him.He is widely believed to be living in Australia.So, Lord Lucan astronaut, axolotls,bad facial hair, which is mustaches,the variations of color in fallopian tubes,and days of the week.Those, are some baller suggestions.And this is gonna be a baller, freestyle rap.That is a rap made up on the spotbut it's entire notes, not written or scripted,never to be seen again.No worry, it's not going to be as shit asyou think it will be!Let's drop that beat my friend, let's have some fun!(audience cheers)I chose quite a chill rap, so we get too excited,too early in the show.(rap beat)♪ A rap that's never been seen before ♪♪ My favorite day of the week is Thursday ♪♪ Because Thor the Norse God ♪♪ It's named after him, and I say ♪♪ Go back a date, you've got Odin's day ♪♪ That's why Wednesday ♪♪ Is spelled so strange ♪♪ Monday, named after moon, a big range ♪♪ Sunday the sun, obviously ♪♪ Sat, yes Saturn, the planet ♪♪ Yeah, but then Friday happened ♪♪ That's Freya, another Norse God of violence ♪♪ What's the last one yeah, I draw silence♪♪ We did all of those, yeah, I'm in heaven ♪♪ It's Norse Valhalla counting the days of the week ♪♪ That is seven ♪♪ And Wednesday, is the hump day ♪♪ I can't handle ya ♪♪ I always cross it out, there on the calendar ♪♪ I don't want it ♪♪ Oh, I remember, Tuesday, yeah let me come ♪♪ And sever one hand off ♪♪ That's what the God Tew did ♪♪ People forget about him ♪♪ I kid you ♪♪ TYR is technically Tyr's day ♪♪ Having lots of fun, hold the hands and sway ♪♪ Nobody likes Norse gods ♪♪ But that's not that odd ♪♪ I look down in the kind of female bod ♪♪ I stare down ♪♪ I get my little scalpel ♪♪ And then I insert it above the genitals ♪♪ I'm looking to the side, yeah I peer through this ♪♪ It's a speculum right at the uterus ♪♪ I look to the side, and I'm so happy ♪♪ To be greeted by what transports the egg ♪♪ From the ovary ♪♪ That's the fallopian tube ♪♪ And make sure into the womb it moves ♪♪ You might just think ♪♪ I thought it all was vaginas, but no ♪♪ It's amazing ♪♪ Some of them are dull and some of them are shiny ♪♪ Some of them are pink ♪♪ Some of them are purple ♪♪ Some of them are dull brown ♪♪ That's quite hurtful ♪♪ If your fallopians was so beige-y ♪♪ Kind of horrible, but still ♪♪ They make babies ♪♪ That's right ♪♪ Then you push them out from down there ♪♪ When the baby's born it has no facial hair ♪♪ And if it did, really, you would shave its face ♪♪ A baby with a mustache, in that place ♪♪ On the lip, on the palate ♪♪ You'd say whoa, infant, get it off, take a little Bic ♪♪ Razor in front ♪♪ Shave off the lip ♪♪ Yeah, get there ♪♪ I made the baby look like Adolf Hitler ♪♪ Why did Hitler have a mustache? ♪♪ Was it when he was young? ♪♪ Maybe, probably ♪♪ Yeah I feel highly strung ♪♪ Like a Lord running from the law when he killed a nanny ♪♪ Yeah, we know about this, you don't understand me ♪♪ Lord Lucan, not stealin', not lootin' ♪♪ He ran away, on a train, from Luton ♪♪ That's a railway station near London ♪♪ Went off to Cape Canaveral ♪♪ Yeah, we thundered ♪♪ Right through the door ♪♪ Said the nanny, I just glassed her ♪♪ So I need to sign up here, to NASA ♪♪ Please, take me into space on the shuttle ♪♪ I'm really in trouble because ♪♪ The nanny is in a puddle of blood ♪♪ And my wife, and my son came home ♪♪ And said why'd you kill the nanny, Lord ♪♪ But I was gone ♪♪ I ran away, and a lot Lorde like the kiwi singer ♪♪ I'm in space now ♪♪ Please come try and bring all of the food ♪♪ And the nutrients I need, to the ISS ♪♪ My horrible greed led to me to be murdered ♪♪ Need to be killed ♪♪ I'm the worst Lord since Lord Damon Hill ♪♪ He was a racing driver ♪♪ I don't think he was made into a Lord ♪♪ Could have said Lord Alan Sugar ♪♪ I would be adored ♪♪ What was the last one from you guys in this section ♪♪ Spit it back at me, yeah gimme that reflection ♪♪ Off the water, I see a tiny thing ♪♪ Lookin' like a snake ♪♪ but it's got some tiny, little legs ♪♪ You know I want to take it from Mexico ♪♪ They're illegal to export ♪♪ And if I find out, I will fuckin' report you ♪♪ 'Cause they're so damn cute ♪♪ I feel quite astute ♪♪ I feel intelligent that I know these tiny little newts ♪♪ Some of them are black, and some of them are white ♪♪ They've got great blind vision ♪♪ in the middle of the night ♪♪ They're not like fish ♪♪ but they're not like amphibians ♪♪ Yeah, look at the little gills and their little limbs ♪♪ They look kind of feathery red ♪♪ It's like they've got little quills ♪♪ in the side of their head ♪♪ Why did I like them so much, when I was a smile (meant to say child obviously) ♪♪ I really love the axolotls, yeah ♪♪ Lookin' at the child (and clearly that should have been smile) ♪♪ They're always grinning, like a quokka ♪♪ So I'm going to go to Mexico, with a bottle ♪♪ I'm walkin' to the cave, and try and beckon it in ♪♪ Say, c'mon little axolotl give it a grin ♪♪ And it would swim, right up to me ♪♪ And then I transport it, out of the country ♪♪ How I put in my bum, ♪♪ I'd waddle through security ♪♪ Take it back it there, I would adore it ♪♪ It'd stare at me ♪♪ I'd pat it on his head ♪♪ I would say, you're great ♪♪ And then I'd invite round my best mate - Lord Lucan ♪♪ There you go ♪Thank you for watching.Please watch more with playlists, here.Subscribe here.Like, comment, all those things.Shouting, bye!

THIS RAP WILL MAKE YOU SMARTER

View online
< ?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8" ?><>
<text sub="clublinks" start="0" dur="1.443">- And this side here, if you're in this section</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="1.443" dur="1.264">of this little section here,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="2.707" dur="1.806">what do you want to hear a rap about?</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="5.98" dur="1.11">- [Audience Member] Days of the week.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="7.09" dur="0.975">- The days of the week?</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="8.065" dur="0.833">(audience laughs)</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="8.898" dur="2.012">What a great fuckin' suggestion!</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="10.91" dur="2.16">Mate, that's just so, it's right under our noses!</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="13.07" dur="1.59">I like that, cool.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="14.66" dur="1.22">Everyone else fuckin' hated it,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="15.88" dur="0.833">but they're wrong.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="16.713" dur="1.047">They are.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="17.76" dur="1.01">You know, he probably,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="18.77" dur="0.833">it's Friday night,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="19.603" dur="0.833">You're probably like,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="20.436" dur="2.464">'Oh, why can't I say big hairy balls or something?"</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="22.9" dur="0.833">Days of the week.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="23.733" dur="2.692">Right so, you guys here, what do you want to rap about?</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="26.425" dur="1.185">- [Audience Member] Fallopian tubes.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="27.61" dur="3.43">- There were two, pigments of color and fallopian tubes.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="31.04" dur="3.19">We will take the variation of colors,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="34.23" dur="1.354">in fallopian tubes.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="35.584" dur="2.113">(audience laughs)</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="37.697" dur="2.423">- I'm sure they're all different colors, aren't they?</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="40.12" dur="0.856">Cool, so.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="40.976" dur="1.164">(audience laughs)</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="42.14" dur="1.43">Probably.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="43.57" dur="1.16">And don't make out like you've seen them!</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="44.73" dur="2.44">None of you have seen fallopian tubes.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="47.17" dur="2.09">My dick's so big, I fucking see them all the--</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="49.26" dur="0.833">No!</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="51.67" dur="1.38">Okay, so days of the week,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="53.05" dur="2.25">the variation of color in fallopian tubes,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="55.3" dur="1.668">stop explaining what fallopian tubes are.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="56.968" dur="2.562">(audience laughs)</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="59.53" dur="1.98">What, guys in the middle, what do you want to rap about?</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="61.51" dur="0.89">- [Audience member] Bad facial hair!</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="62.4" dur="1.88">- Bad facial hair, cool.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="64.28" dur="1.73">Just wanna check, that's not pointed at me is it?</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="66.01" dur="0.927">I am--</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="66.937" dur="0.833">(audience laughs)</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="67.77" dur="0.833">Oh good.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="68.603" dur="0.833">Uh, bad facial hair,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="69.436" dur="1.937">what would you say is the worst facial hair?</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="72.806" dur="0.833">- [Audience Member] A mustache.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="73.639" dur="0.941">- A mustache?</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="74.58" dur="0.833">Okay, cool.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="75.413" dur="1.947">I mean you had the goatee to go for,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="77.36" dur="1.86">you chose mustache, no!</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="79.22" dur="1.93">Mustache, fine, mustache.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="81.15" dur="0.833">Days of the week.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="81.983" dur="2.447">The variations of color in fallopian tubes.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="84.43" dur="2.24">Guys over here, so far these are some great suggestions.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="86.67" dur="1.123">So let's keep it up.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="87.793" dur="1.036">- [Audience Member] Axolotls.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="88.829" dur="1.388">- Axolotls, ah!</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="90.217" dur="1.233">(audience cheers)</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="91.45" dur="2.83">- Jesus fucking Christ, what's wrong with you?</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="94.28" dur="1.98">Hi, we're the Australian Axolotl Association,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="96.26" dur="2.56">Triple A, yeah, having a great time, yeah?</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="98.82" dur="1.2">They are an animal, but,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="101.12" dur="2.12">because it's quite specific and niche,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="103.24" dur="2.06">I feel like that's a fair suggestion.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="105.3" dur="1.23">The animals rules just stop people saying</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="106.53" dur="1.34">dogs and stuff like that.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="107.87" dur="1.32">If you don't know what axolotls are,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="109.19" dur="3.2">they a type of kind of permanently juvenile salamander</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="112.39" dur="1.58">that lives in a network of caves,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="113.97" dur="2.64">only in Central America, specifically, I think Mexico.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="116.61" dur="2.171">And yeah, fuck you, I know loads about them so,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="118.781" dur="1.739">(audience laughs)</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="120.52" dur="1.74">I love it when people try and catch you out,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="122.26" dur="1.65">and then you're like uh, when I was thirteen,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="123.91" dur="1.16">I really wanted an axolotl,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="125.07" dur="1.436">because I didn't have any friends.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="126.506" dur="1.844">(audience laughs)</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="128.35" dur="1.1">- Guys over here.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="129.45" dur="0.833">- [Audience Member] Brexit!</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="130.283" dur="0.833">- What?</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="131.116" dur="0.833">- [Audience Member] Brexit!</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="131.949" dur="1.331">- Brexit's too obvious a suggestion, I'm afraid.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="133.28" dur="1.99">I know it is literally happening right now,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="135.27" dur="1.8">like this is the final day.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="137.07" dur="0.85">We're gonna finish the show</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="137.92" dur="1.98">by holding hands and singing Auld Lang Syne</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="139.9" dur="1.867">it's going to be great.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="141.767" dur="1.473">- [Audience member] Astronauts!</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="143.24" dur="1.44">- Lord Lucan and astronaut.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="144.68" dur="3.14">Okay, Lord Lucan astronaut, yeah.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="147.82" dur="2.418">Oh, you guys know who Lord Lucan is, right?</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="150.238" dur="0.852">(audience shouts)</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="151.09" dur="1.639">Well you'll find out in the rap, won't you?</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="152.729" dur="1.971">(audience laughs)</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="154.7" dur="0.833">Okay, cool.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="155.533" dur="2.467">So, I love the fact that like 20 of you knew axolotls,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="158" dur="2.57">but you're like, oh a kind of British Lord</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="160.57" dur="2.33">who murdered his wife, no, we've never heard of him.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="162.9" dur="3.03">He is widely believed to be living in Australia.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="165.93" dur="3.63">So, Lord Lucan astronaut, axolotls,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="169.56" dur="2.13">bad facial hair, which is mustaches,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="171.69" dur="2">the variations of color in fallopian tubes,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="173.69" dur="0.943">and days of the week.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="174.633" dur="2.347">Those, are some baller suggestions.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="176.98" dur="2.153">And this is gonna be a baller, freestyle rap.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="179.133" dur="1.637">That is a rap made up on the spot</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="180.77" dur="1.711">but it's entire notes, not written or scripted,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="182.481" dur="1.299">never to be seen again.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="183.78" dur="2.03">No worry, it's not going to be as shit as</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="185.81" dur="1.38">you think it will be!</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="187.19" dur="2.66">Let's drop that beat my friend, let's have some fun!</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="189.85" dur="2.833">(audience cheers)</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="194.134" dur="2.146">I chose quite a chill rap, so we get too excited,</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="196.28" dur="1.1">too early in the show.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="198.684" dur="2.25">(rap beat)</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="202.348" dur="1.866">♪ A rap that's never been seen before ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="204.214" dur="1.667">♪ My favorite day of the week is Thursday ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="205.881" dur="1.886">♪ Because Thor the Norse God ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="207.767" dur="2.375">♪ It's named after him, and I say ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="210.142" dur="2.039">♪ Go back a date, you've got Odin's day ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="212.181" dur="1.062">♪ That's why Wednesday ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="213.243" dur="1.48">♪ Is spelled so strange ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="214.723" dur="2.546">♪ Monday, named after moon, a big range ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="217.269" dur="2.057">♪ Sunday the sun, obviously ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="219.326" dur="2.088">♪ Sat, yes Saturn, the planet ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="221.414" dur="1.88">♪ Yeah, but then Friday happened ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="223.294" dur="2.597">♪ That's Freya, another Norse God of violence ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="225.891" dur="2.83">♪ What's the last one yeah, I draw silence♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="228.721" dur="2.411">♪ We did all of those, yeah, I'm in heaven ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="231.132" dur="1.964">♪ It's Norse Valhalla counting the days of the week ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="233.096" dur="0.833">♪ That is seven ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="233.929" dur="1.814">♪ And Wednesday, is the hump day ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="235.743" dur="1.379">♪ I can't handle ya ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="237.122" dur="2.658">♪ I always cross it out, there on the calendar ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="239.78" dur="1.132">♪ I don't want it ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="240.912" dur="3.028">♪ Oh, I remember, Tuesday, yeah let me come ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="243.94" dur="1.562">♪ And sever one hand off ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="245.502" dur="1.766">♪ That's what the God Tew did ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="247.268" dur="1.919">♪ People forget about him ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="249.187" dur="1.135">♪ I kid you ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="250.322" dur="2.684">♪ TYR is technically Tyr's day ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="253.006" dur="2.162">♪ Having lots of fun, hold the hands and sway ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="255.168" dur="1.32">♪ Nobody likes Norse gods ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="256.488" dur="1.394">♪ But that's not that odd ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="257.882" dur="3.003">♪ I look down in the kind of female bod ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="260.885" dur="0.887">♪ I stare down ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="261.772" dur="1.504">♪ I get my little scalpel ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="263.276" dur="2.728">♪ And then I insert it above the genitals ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="266.004" dur="2.673">♪ I'm looking to the side, yeah I peer through this ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="268.677" dur="2.645">♪ It's a speculum right at the uterus ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="271.322" dur="2.612">♪ I look to the side, and I'm so happy ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="273.934" dur="2.068">♪ To be greeted by what transports the egg ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="276.002" dur="1.194">♪ From the ovary ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="277.196" dur="1.817">♪ That's the fallopian tube ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="279.013" dur="2.691">♪ And make sure into the womb it moves ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="281.704" dur="1.005">♪ You might just think ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="282.709" dur="2.371">♪ I thought it all was vaginas, but no ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="285.08" dur="0.833">♪ It's amazing ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="285.913" dur="1.936">♪ Some of them are dull and some of them are shiny ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="287.849" dur="1.227">♪ Some of them are pink ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="289.076" dur="1.463">♪ Some of them are purple ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="290.539" dur="1.302">♪ Some of them are dull brown ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="291.841" dur="1.195">♪ That's quite hurtful ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="293.036" dur="2.852">♪ If your fallopians was so beige-y ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="295.888" dur="1.303">♪ Kind of horrible, but still ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="297.191" dur="1.405">♪ They make babies ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="298.596" dur="0.833">♪ That's right ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="299.429" dur="1.916">♪ Then you push them out from down there ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="301.345" dur="2.516">♪ When the baby's born it has no facial hair ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="303.861" dur="2.432">♪ And if it did, really, you would shave its face ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="306.293" dur="2.627">♪ A baby with a mustache, in that place ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="308.92" dur="1.663">♪ On the lip, on the palate ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="310.583" dur="3.202">♪ You'd say whoa, infant, get it off, take a little Bic ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="313.785" dur="0.978">♪ Razor in front ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="314.763" dur="1.177">♪ Shave off the lip ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="315.94" dur="1.395">♪ Yeah, get there ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="317.335" dur="2.447">♪ I made the baby look like Adolf Hitler ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="319.782" dur="1.7">♪ Why did Hitler have a mustache? ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="321.482" dur="1.401">♪ Was it when he was young? ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="322.883" dur="1.305">♪ Maybe, probably ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="324.188" dur="1.215">♪ Yeah I feel highly strung ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="325.403" dur="2.859">♪ Like a Lord running from the law when he killed a nanny ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="328.262" dur="2.631">♪ Yeah, we know about this, you don't understand me ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="330.893" dur="2.472">♪ Lord Lucan, not stealin', not lootin' ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="333.365" dur="2.715">♪ He ran away, on a train, from Luton ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="336.08" dur="2.139">♪ That's a railway station near London ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="338.219" dur="1.598">♪ Went off to Cape Canaveral ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="339.817" dur="0.977">♪ Yeah, we thundered ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="340.794" dur="1.263">♪ Right through the door ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="342.057" dur="2.254">♪ Said the nanny, I just glassed her ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="344.311" dur="2.495">♪ So I need to sign up here, to NASA ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="346.806" dur="2.516">♪ Please, take me into space on the shuttle ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="349.322" dur="1.587">♪ I'm really in trouble because ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="350.909" dur="1.563">♪ The nanny is in a puddle of blood ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="352.472" dur="2.158">♪ And my wife, and my son came home ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="354.63" dur="1.586">♪ And said why'd you kill the nanny, Lord ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="356.216" dur="1.265">♪ But I was gone ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="357.481" dur="2.995">♪ I ran away, and a lot Lorde like the kiwi singer ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="360.476" dur="1.272">♪ I'm in space now ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="361.748" dur="2.221">♪ Please come try and bring all of the food ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="363.969" dur="2.592">♪ And the nutrients I need, to the ISS ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="366.561" dur="2.873">♪ My horrible greed led to me to be murdered ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="369.434" dur="1.294">♪ Need to be killed ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="370.728" dur="2.61">♪ I'm the worst Lord since Lord Damon Hill ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="373.338" dur="1.228">♪ He was a racing driver ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="374.566" dur="1.473">♪ I don't think he was made into a Lord ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="376.039" dur="1.546">♪ Could have said Lord Alan Sugar ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="377.585" dur="1.373">♪ I would be adored ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="378.958" dur="2.792">♪ What was the last one from you guys in this section ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="381.75" dur="2.653">♪ Spit it back at me, yeah gimme that reflection ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="384.403" dur="1.836">♪ Off the water, I see a tiny thing ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="386.239" dur="1.17">♪ Lookin' like a snake ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="387.409" dur="1.523">♪ but it's got some tiny, little legs ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="388.932" dur="1.894">♪ You know I want to take it from Mexico ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="390.826" dur="1.582">♪ They're illegal to export ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="392.408" dur="2.557">♪ And if I find out, I will fuckin' report you ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="394.965" dur="1.539">♪ 'Cause they're so damn cute ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="396.504" dur="1.198">♪ I feel quite astute ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="397.702" dur="2.824">♪ I feel intelligent that I know these tiny little newts ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="400.526" dur="2.489">♪ Some of them are black, and some of them are white ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="403.015" dur="1.351">♪ They've got great blind vision ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="404.366" dur="1.454">♪ in the middle of the night ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="405.82" dur="1.194">♪ They're not like fish ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="407.014" dur="1.733">♪ but they're not like amphibians ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="408.747" dur="2.559">♪ Yeah, look at the little gills and their little limbs ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="411.306" dur="1.882">♪ They look kind of feathery red ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="413.188" dur="1.336">♪ It's like they've got little quills ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="414.524" dur="1.309">♪ in the side of their head ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="415.833" dur="3.206">♪ Why did I like them so much, when I was a smile (meant to say child obviously) ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="419.039" dur="1.667">♪ I really love the axolotls, yeah ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="420.706" dur="1.268">♪ Lookin' at the child (and clearly that should have been smile) ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="421.974" dur="2.247">♪ They're always grinning, like a quokka ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="424.221" dur="2.424">♪ So I'm going to go to Mexico, with a bottle ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="426.645" dur="2.729">♪ I'm walkin' to the cave, and try and beckon it in ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="429.374" dur="3.139">♪ Say, c'mon little axolotl give it a grin ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="432.513" dur="2.66">♪ And it would swim, right up to me ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="435.173" dur="2.629">♪ And then I transport it, out of the country ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="437.802" dur="1.447">♪ How I put in my bum, ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="439.249" dur="1.549">♪ I'd waddle through security ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="440.798" dur="2.062">♪ Take it back it there, I would adore it ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="442.86" dur="1.059">♪ It'd stare at me ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="443.919" dur="0.905">♪ I'd pat it on his head ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="444.824" dur="1.343">♪ I would say, you're great ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="446.167" dur="2.556">♪ And then I'd invite round my best mate - Lord Lucan ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="448.723" dur="0.833">♪ There you go ♪</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="449.556" dur="0.894">Thank you for watching.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="450.45" dur="2.15">Please watch more with playlists, here.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="452.6" dur="1.09">Subscribe here.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="453.69" dur="1.638">Like, comment, all those things.</text>
<text sub="clublinks" start="455.328" dur="1.172">Shouting, bye!</text>